So you’re wishing that you never did all the embarrassing things you’ve done?
And you’re wishing you could set it right
And you’re wishing you could stay the night
But then I go again
Wishing never solved a problem
If you want to get it big time
Go ahead and get it get it big time
— yeasayer’s “tightrope”
when i named my blog i decided to make reference to the game of footsie simply because it’s one of those silly things people do with each other that - no matter what - always makes us smile. sometimes it’s a surprise or an accident, or sometimes it’s mutual and full of giggles. but sometimes the interactions we share with each other are everything but coy and gentle. sometimes there are tears, frustrations, and stormy weather, storming off. the moments when honesty turns too honest and toes get stepped on. the moments when no one says a thing, assumptions are verbalized, and someone ends up with a foot in their mouth. wouldn’t it be nice if we could all speak nicely and softly, with care and eye contact, just as we would under the covers with our lovers. yes, but even lovers quarrel.
i write this for my friends, one of whom i walked home with other night in the dark, and another who has just started on her own again. i hope you find your steps. i hope you can share soft spoken confessions. i hope you can see, even in the darkness, that the signs are there, and you will find your way. sometimes we make mistakes. sometimes we let mistakes go on for a long, long time. but we do get to look at them afterwards and realize that we’ve learned. and we get to call out to our friends and gather hugs and support. i hope you will follow your heart and find what you’re looking for. if you haven’t already, you will make the right choice. it’s yours. love and learn. and don’t be afraid to take a new step with those feet.